Category Archives: Senility

Strange Prayer

I’d have to be better than God to give up smoking.

Only joking.

I am pretty old but I haven’t given up yet.

Living that is, and the old wine cup, you bet.

Alright, beer, or as I call it, stout.

Am I found out?

Lord make me good but not yet was Saint Augustine’s prayer.

Before he became a saint, I am not there.

To be smoke free would improve my financial position.

Otherwise I am in good condition.

Heal thyself, physician.

To give up would make one or two people glad.

And I would be less mad.

Not bad.

If God is doing the right thing then its up to me.

The rest is history.

Or should I say the past.

I was a trawler fisherman, my years before the mast.

I end in inconsequentiality.

Wait and see.

Tich Ennis

12th September, 2017

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Fifty

My fifty is broke, how will I smoke?

I’ll smoke butts, I’m nuts.

Tich Ennis

23rd August, 2017

Full Stop

My best friend Michael O’Brien agrees I should stop giving my stuff away for nothing on my blog. I have written various things and not put them there recently, too busy.

I have only 75 or 76 followers on my blog. My nephew said people liking and following other people’s blogs often only want a like or a following in return. I don’t want those likes and followers. I know at least one is genuine, the only one I wrote to and who replied. Thank you.

My plan is to have a book printed and sell it locally, quite a few people, maybe 43, have said they will buy. I will sell it for almost nothing, the printer will make more than me.

I ordered a book on self-publishing from Amazon today, by Rick Smith, which seems the best on the subject. So my work may be available as a print on demand book (POD) and also electronically when I can get my head around how to set up writing for those and uploading and all that.

That way is known as going over the heads of the gatekeepers, who are very good at slamming doors in people’s faces and ignoring them. Going direct to the public.

25 per cent of the top selling books on Amazon are self published, usually half POD and half digitally. Digital books have a 65 per cent market share, and growing.   People buying digital books buy more books, presumably because they are cheaper than on paper, as well as instantly delivered and other advantages.  Being old and traditional I prefer paper books and do not own an electronic book reader. Also being broke.

The paper method costs more, including to me to get my book printed locally for which I will have to borrow.   Selling as a self publisher through Amazon involves a steep learning curve, hopefully I get to the top of that hill!   But no cost to the writer, except time and know how.   The know how I do not have but hope to learn.

Of course not every book sells, I am well aware of that. Today I heard I failed to win a short story competition. A friend of mine said, when you’re starting you have to do everything for yourself.

Contrary to my title here, this may not be my last word ever on my blog. Look forward to Full Start.

I’m a crazy mixed up old man, not a crazy mixed up kid.

Tich Ennis

4th August, 2017

My Mind Wanders

I am quite old.

A story retold.

What holds my interest right through?

Anything well done by me or you.

Quite or rather good or even sometimes when I should, my mind moves away.

The best should stand the test, I can go back another day.

I focus like a laser beam in a dream.

Which sometimes occurs when reading his or hers.

Dreams are best, God bless imagination.

The Garden of Eden requires restoration.

Tich Ennis

2nd July, 2017

Toddler

Bemused, confused, I toddle on.

Who knows right from wrong?

Excuse my look of consternation.

I overhear your conversation.

So, some are older even than me.

Some younger too, I toddle on.

With whom shall I agree?

Someone, somewhere set me free.

Am I a slave until my grave?

Fortune favours the brave.

Each step I take nearer to my maker I make.

Should I put him right on a thing or two or is that me or is it you?

What’s a guy to do?

Ask you?

When all else fails observe jet trails.

Birds fly in the blue.

They know what to do.

Tich Ennis

30th June, 2017

Fix The World

Right said Fred.

I’ll do it when I’m dead.

Its too late then said the undertaker.

Who will pay my cabinet maker?

I’ll try to fit you in on Monday after Coronation Street said Fred, speaking again.

Alright said the undertaker, that’s alright then.

Are you a man of your word?

You wouldn’t believe the rubbish I have heard.

I don’t believe it myself said Fred to me.

Any chance of a cup of tea?

I’ll put the kettle on said she.

Wait and see.

You took the words out of my mouth said he.

I will be back. Probably.

No mention of infinity.

That means so much to me.

After all I’m no Einstein or only relatively.

You workmen are all the same!

Promises are your game.

Still, I’m glad you came.

I’ll expect you when I see you.

Until then, do you take sugar? One or two?

Oh, thank you.

Tich Ennis

13th June, 2017

Fear

I am afraid of learning new things.

Okay, I’m over forty, older than some kings.

A friend said when you get to forty you don’t want to learn anything new.

Has that happened to you?

Einstein made his great discovery before the age of twenty-five.

For the rest of his life he did more or less nothing except say he is alive.

And so also with some other famous men.

When my uncle and aunt were middle aged he said they are two setting suns.

Children are more or less learning machines then they forget everything they ever knew.

I am an old child not knowing what to do.

That friend of mine is eighty-two.

What’s more he still cuts his grass.

I do not, alas.

If you don’t move with the times you’re dead.

I said.

A nephew of mine said when you stop learning its over.

His dog is not called Rover.

Einstein, relatively speaking, was right.

Though not absolutely, I could go on all night.

Scientists keep disproving the last one’s work.

What about me? I shirk.

Its too much like work.

Why doesn’t a man on a white horse come riding by and solve my problems in the wink of an eye?

I suppose I’ll have to do it before I die.

I should mention Goya said he was still learning at the age of ninety-five.

Though not that age I am still alive.

All my faculties are alive and kicking.

When will I stop tricking?

I was not put on Earth to disappoint.

Come priest, anoint.

When I die will I make a wonderful corpse?

People may say, he died waiting for a horse.

Come, pale rider, is the pale rider me?

As Shakespeare said, to be or not to be.

Instead of doing things I write poetry.

That’s me.

I have an awful lot to say.

Some other time, I’ll be on my way.

My mother said if you won’t go to school you’ll have to get a job.

Big nob?

She also asked do I take anything seriously.

Not me.

A cup of tea.

Seriousness is morbidity, morbidity is death.

I’m not there yet.

I lament Tibet.

How about girls with slashes in their jeans at the knees?

Designer poverty, puhleese.

In times like these.

I am God’s misbegotten son.

Not the only one.

Have fun.

Should I say more about why I am so slow?

A snail gets there, you know.

Shell rhymes with Hell.

Self inflicted wounds are hardest to cure.

Endure.

Roses grow in manure.

Do I mean a word I say?

Oh everything.

Meaning is king.

I mean to say I go.

Words no one wants to hear, I told you so.

Tich Ennis

10th June, 2017