Category Archives: Comprehension

Bubble

God doesn’t believe in God, is that the trouble?

Did you go broke in the last bubble?

Some people say there is no Hell, how do they know?

Because the Devil told them so.

They believe in nothing they can’t see.

Is that like you and me?

A person who knows everything is God, of course.

A pantomime horse.

You meet them everywhere, common as air.

If you are God then I am snoring, because you’re boring.

Maybe it doesn’t suit you to believe.

Who’s fooling who, goodbye, I take my leave.

Tich Ennis

3rd October, 2018

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Presidential Address to the United Nations

There is presently an election for president in the Republic of Ireland, only one candidate so far on the ballot, the present incumbent, who said when he stood seven years ago that he would not stand again. He was a politician, what do they say about politician’s promises?

He also said he was seventy years old, he could not help that. Now he is seventy-seven years old and counting.   Various other candidates have put themselves forward, all of the loony tunes variety. It is not enough to look in the mirror and say you’re great to be worthy of office.

With all due respect may I say it will be a case of voting for the least worst option. In the event of a tragedy in which all Irish people succumb to an unnamed disease except myself I now prepare myself for office as Eddy the Eagle represented Britain in the winter olympics some years ago, no one else having nominated themselves. I too am seventy-seven years old and have seen it all before. I’ve seen the world, I didn’t like it, and I quote. This is all by way of preamble.   As the boy scouts’ motto has it, be prepared. So here I go.

Speech

         My fellow human beings, what is to be human, or indeed to be? The genocidal maniacs among you may have your own answers, don’t all rush. I laugh that I may not weep. The moral high ground is getting overcrowded.

Capitalism is the exploitation of man by man, communism is the other way around. Life is a tale told by an idiot signifying nothing, don’t quote me on that. Man’s inhumanity to man. The remarkable equanimity with which we greet the misfortune of others. Power comes out of the barrel of a gun. All utopias end in dictatorship. All revolutions evaporate leaving behind only the slime of their bureaucracy.

It has all been said before but no one listened. Don’t confuse me with the facts. There’s no such thing as a free lunch. What are the lessons of history? History is written by the victors, and is written in blood. Who are the good guys?

Evil was vanquished, good triumphed and they all lived happily ever after, that is the meaning of fiction. A diplomat is a man sent abroad to lie for his country. Is mutual self interest enough to be going on with? What about the planet? Hows about that there then?   They knocked down Paradise and put up a parking lot.

Who has the answer? What is the answer? What was the question? As the only living Irishman may I ask this question, did I vote for myself? If so, I am not alone. One among many. We live in an age in which perception is treated as more important than reality. What else is new? Realpolitik means the reality behind the well practised smiles. The way things really are, you all know what I mean. I believe what you do not what you say.

Self preservation is said to be the strongest instinct, but what of the love of a mother for her child? Some sacrifice themselves for others, not all is lost. Some give their lives.

Its better to be a live coward than a dead hero. When a gun is pointed at you, you don’t argue. Not if you want to stay alive, which is the wish of all of us. Some rule by terror. You know who you are.

Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose, freedom don’t mean nothing if it ain’t free, and I misquote. Why are some words banned and illegal more or less everywhere?   What are you afraid of? That the others, the broad masses of the people are like you?

If you can’t beat them join them. I do not agree. Are things the way they are because that’s how people want them to be?   No. And you know it.   Who’s fooling who?

There are great scientific and medical advances and also in the weapons of warfare. Science is neither good nor bad, it depends what purpose it serves. That is a matter of choice, the choice of a human. What is good and bad? You know without being told. Is war ever good? Does the end justify the means? I say no, but who am I to speak? Power for its own sake is corrupt and corrupting. Anything for its own sake is bad. Also mad.

Power maniacs make life a misery for others, as can be seen and heard when the truth is allowed to be spoken. Which is not everywhere. As you well know. Shut up and eat your bun.

Fine words butter no parsnips. Actions speak louder than words. By their works shall ye know them, and we do.

It has all been said before and I say it again. Here goes nothing. You win some, you lose some. It cannot be said often enough that repeating yourself is boring. Ask a parrot. There are many, many in human form.

I know you all know you are important, you make that very clear. More important than others? No. I don’t like to disillusion you, but we should not live in illusion. Illusions are false, not true, lies. You are not more important than others, the same, no more or less. That’s all.   Nor is your country nor mine. I believe in equality, do you? Don’t answer that, your belief is proved by your actions.

When we stop putting ourselves first the world’s problems will be solved. Live and let live, let that be your motto.

You know all this already. It’s a well kept secret. The secret everyone knows.   Waiting to be spoken. Waiting to be told. Now it has been.

Don’t say I didn’t tell you. That’s telling you.

Go back to your luxury embassies and ponder my words. You have ears to hear and a mouth to speak, which is more than some people are allowed.   If you want a better world make it better. Start at home. But don’t finish there. Allow people to be themselves.

That would be a start.

You have to start somewhere.

I end. An end to illusion. No more heroes. No more lies. Peace and justice for all. Let’s not live in fantasy.

I choose reality. Pray to the God of your choice. May he forgive you. A deathbed repentance is too little, too late.

At long last love.

More later.

Tich Ennis

23rd August, 2018

 

 

 

Modern Song

I want to commit suicide but I haven’t got the guts.

Don’t you know I’m nuts?

I want to share my misery and pain with you.

I think that’s the right thing to do.

You’re nuts too.

You enjoy my stuff because you are a misery boots.

I don’t give two hoots.

I am a comedian on stage, I give vent to rage.

A funny thing happened on the way to the loony bin.

Or alcoholic treatment place or drugs clinic, where do I begin?

I am depressed and I want the world to know.

Its my ego, its not small, I am a bomb about to blow.

Yeah, well, so people get killed at pop shows, so what?

I have the ticket money, thanks a lot.

I made sense once but I forgot.

Cheer up some other voice said.

It could be worse, you could be dead.

Who says everything is futile?

Some guy who forgot how to smile.

Life is awful, you’ll get over it in a while.

Is there no place for laughter, none for joy.

Not from this boy.

I say life is a one way suicide trip.

And people say I’m hip.

There is a word, masochist, look it up.

When you understand its meaning I might shut up.

And drink the loving cup.

In the meantime, okay, eat my turds.

You don’t understand words.

Because you don’t want to, it doesn’t suit you.

People like you shoot you.

Wallow like a pig.

Call me mister big.

Since when has it been best to be insane?

As that stupid saying has it, feel my pain.

Your pain is self inflicted.

You are addicted.

Grow up, get out more, life your life you fool.

Did you learn insanity at school?

Okay, I’ve had my say, I don’t eat vomit.

I prefer Wallace and Gromit.

I smoke and smoking is mad so I’m mad too.

Just like you.

I am the meaning of this song.

If I gave you a rope would you say so long?

Who has the cure, you or me?

Wait and see.

I do not choose misery and woe.

I go.

And so do you, what are you, Asian flu?

Solve the Arab Israeli conflict and I’ll believe you.

You are not the answer.

Chancer.

As for me, I am a dancer.

You are a romancer and romance is false.

I prefer rock‘n’roll to the waltz.

I too have faults.

If you see yourself in this song well, hello.

I don’t want to say I told you so.

Music should be fun or transcendental.

Not, as we say in Ireland, mental.

Is there a place for gentle?

Tich Ennis

1st August, 2018

Make People Think

To write an app to make or help people think is an impossible task like making a perpetual motion machine, which I have on good authority is not possible. Not even the universe is a perpetual machine. Have you heard of entropy? Look it up. There is a finite amount of energy in the universe, use it sparingly.

Some American said do a person’s thinking for them and they love you, make them think and they hate you. Do pupils love school? Not unless it has been dumbed down to their level. Or their teachers’.

Was that American right? Not all Americans are wrong. It is racism to say otherwise. The same applies to all other races and conditions of men and women. And boys and girls. And babes in arms, or men in arms. Delete that.

My brother wishes to make or have made for him with a little help from his friends such an app. He attempts or wishes for the impossible.   Thinking made easy.

Signs of the times. When young I visited offices with this sign on the wall, We work miracles, the impossible takes longer. Also, You don’t have to be mad to work here, but it helps. That last sign was never in government offices, the only ones where it always should be.

A machine to make people sane? Who would buy? Thinking for Dummies.  Remember, the mad think themselves sane.   Are you mad if you don’t think? Don’t all rush to answer.   A Critique of Pure Reason says reason alone is not enough but does not recommend unreasonableness. Do you?

When ignorance is bliss ‘tis folly to be wise. Love is a form of madness, which has many forms. According to some it does not last long, unless it becomes an obsession, itself madness. Most famous mathematicians went mad. Maybe they always were.

Van Gogh did his best work in a mental home, so what’s wrong with being mad? Why don’t people think, is it that they can’t or won’t? Or just don’t want to. See the American above.

Anyway, these are my thoughts on the matter always bearing in mind that thoughts are mad. But always? Cure cancer if you can. And self inflicted or life style illnesses. It’s a matter of choice. Your life style. Have you an attitude problem? Join the club.

Have I made you think? Did it hurt? Take your brain out of cold storage. You’ll be dead long enough, from the neck up or otherwise. Are your feelings hurt?   Do you do outrage? Well or otherwise?

There’s nothing good or bad but thinking makes it so, William Shakespeare. A literary gent.

If you make a think app before my brother infinite riches could be yours. Does that whet your appetite? Fame too. Your name in the papers, on everybody’s lips. Celebrity here you come!

Our brain is the thing with which we think we think. Who said that? I did. Copycat.

Nerds have taken over the world, haven’t you noticed? Swots. Teacher’s pets. There’s no power like brain power. All power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely.

Anyway, if you’re up to it, make a think app. And a perpetual motion machine while you’re at it. You too could invent an atom bomb. Or a cure for cancer. All you need is a think app.

What are you waiting for? Someone to do it for you?

Think.

I think that’s all I’ve got to say, today. Its up to you now. I’ll leave it to you. I know we are in good hands.   I’ll twiddle my thumbs.   Wait and see. That’s me. Thanks for taking this burden from me. I know you can do it.

Does flattery work with you? No, but keep going I hear you say.

I await the future.

Don’t take this literally but I could murder a pint.

Tich Ennis

27th June, 2018

Manchester United

Manchester United probably has no player from Manchester, does it matter?

Who is Sepp Blatter?

Today we have singers who can’t sing, it’s the thing.

Why is nothing what it says it is, the United Nations are not united.

Explain it to a child, it takes some explaining, I am not delighted.

They have as little to do with what they say they are as a bicycle with a car.

The world is very complicated, many things are overrated.

Do you blame people for going mad when the world is mad?

It makes me sad.

Rename something when its name is bad, does that change anything at all?

Am I talking to the wall?

They say a thing is wrong but have no cure.

Is that me or you or them, are you sure?

There’s something not right somewhere, as Shakespeare said, rotten in the state of Denmark.

He did not miss the mark.

For Denmark read everywhere.

Believe me there is good but it is rare.

What is happening to our air?

What qualities make good, dedication and care.

They are still there.

The few are true.

Are you?

Tich Ennis

19th June, 2018