Category Archives: Bloodstain

The Troubles

The trouble with Ireland is all the hardworking, intelligent, energetic people emigrated. I stayed behind, draw your own conclusions.

Some people come to live in Ireland. What the Hell for? The weather? It takes all sorts to make a world. Once there were nothing but Irish people here or more or less, God was it boring. All the buildings falling down and all that sort of thing.

If you go to England you can meet Irish people, but why? Or Spain or America or wherever the Hell else. Avoid Irish pubs, they rip you off. Okay for one day, they will tell you the good places to go, somewhere else is a good idea.

So some Irish guy was in a pub in America going on and on about how wonderful Ireland is, the people, the music, the mountains, the scenery and so on and on and on. If its such a great little country why did you leave it, said his drinking companion.

We Irish love to talk. So a friend of mine was in a foreign country not very far away and he started talking to the man beside him.   The other man, who was not Irish, said you came here to drink, why do you want to talk? That question would not make sense in Ireland.

During the seventies the I.R.A. were bombing, shooting and murdering everyone, mostly each other. We called that the troubles. The second world war was called the emergency in Ireland. Do we ever call things what they are?   We were neutral during that war, but neutral on which side?

Come to Ireland, its better than nothing. It’ll do to be going on with. But don’t stay long, we might drive you mad.   If you’re not mad already.   Ireland is a state of mind, it exists only in the imagination. The imagination of a drunk God. We take after him. What are you having yourself?

I could go on and on, being Irish, but its closing time. Have you no homes to go to?   We have your money, you can go home now. A barman at closing time.   The long goodbye.

So some American came back from the toilet in a bar in Dublin. He said there’s no lock on the toilet door.   I never heard of anyone stealing a shit said the barman. That’s Ireland for you.   Me too.

I’m Irish, what do you expect?

Tich Ennis

22nd January, 2018

 

 

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Anonymous Letter

I am who you don’t know but I know you.

I saw you through the keyhole too.

Be not afraid, I shall not spill the beans.

Do it yourself by all means.

Headlines in the paper inches high.

People will know your name before you die.

In the meantime carry on.

I’m watching you, I’m here, I’m gone.

Tich Ennis

27th December, 2017

Skull Two

I like saying things that mean two things at once.

Some hate it and treat me as a dunce.

Two for the price of one as I once said.

You may get the joke before you’re dead.

Why has a skull a grin on its face?

Maybe a joke is not out of place.

Must I explain clearly as to a fool or child?

Some don’t want to know at school, they drive their teacher wild.

The skull smiled.

Tich Ennis

26th December, 2017

World Leaders

See what Trump is up to and Theresa May.

See what world leaders are up to, allow them have their say.

Then go away.

Some say the news is bad for you, it drives you mad.

You’re better off ignoring it, it makes you sad.

Kings, dictators, and all the other blokes.

Are they comedians, do they tell jokes?

Is it funny, do they want your money?

Many have accounts abroad and are very rich.

What about people in the ditch?

Tich Ennis

26th December, 2017

Remain

God in the damp, God in the stain, God in the pleasure, God in the pain.

They do their best to kill God, kill the truth. God remain.

Stay sane.

Tich Ennis

26th December, 2017

Oh Human Race

I gave you a chance, you spat in my face.

You are a disgrace.

You had a chance, you blew it.

Look at me, there’s nothing to it.

I’ll have a word with your superior, you are irredeemably inferior.

Rich and poor alike, get on your bike!

I cannot depend on you, human zoo.

You may say, pot calling kettle black.

Don’t answer back.

Ignore me at your peril, Gerald Durrell.

Cyril and Beryl.

I’m glad I’ve got that off my chest.

I do my best.

You are my test.

I’ll change my vest.

You write the rest.

Tich Ennis

22nd December, 2017

Extremism

Extremists wear any cloak, they never smile, they never joke.

In the name of what is best they kill the rest.

Nationalism, ideology and other codology it kills you and your child too.

More deadly than the Asian flu.

What the Hell is religion for, to bring us hate and death and war?

How about love one another and everyone and all God made?

You live in shadow and in shade.

Is God a God of peace or what, you believe a lot of rot.

We believe what you do not what you say, Satan, Satan go away.

Allow a child to play.

Tich Ennis

9th December, 2017